Author Archives: marysmithcreative

I volunteered in VBS (vacation bible school) last summer and every day they had a memory saying. “When life gets scary, God is good!” This was day one. They had us leaders repeat it to the students and yell it as a team! It was fun and catchy. I never realized how catchy it was until I’m having a rough day and this comes to my mind, “when life is hard, God is still good”, “when life is unfair, God is good”, pretty much apply God is good to anything. So no matter what you are facing today you may need to stop for a second and declare what it is your facing and the goodness of God still being present. Life truly is a roller coaster full of thrills and fears, moments of utter panick and other moments of absolute joy and laughter. Because as humans are emotions can mislead us we have to remain focusing on the truth which is the Word of God. No matter how tough, scary, painful, fearful, lonely, and unfair life can be, God remains the same. He is a good, good father. He is the same yesterday as he is today as he will be tomorrow. GOD is NOT moved by circumstances. He is not limited either. He can move mountains, physical and spiritual, and emotional. He can do anything. We just have to turn to him and start praising him for who he is. His nature is caring, forgiving, and loving. It’s simply who he is. He doesn’t want us feeling alone and isolated. He doesn’t want us being scared and hurt. He wants us free and confident. Not confident in our own abilities but his. His name has power. We have to start declaring his name. Everything else has to bow at the name of Jesus. Fear has to go. Insecurity has to go. Hopelessness has to go. We have to examine where are focus is and align our focus to be upon our Savior and Lord.

Just remembering that God is good despite how we may feel in moments or circumstances, a little vbs memory saying, brought my eyes back to Jesus.

Don’t doubt for a second that what you’re teaching your kids isn’t getting in their heads. It will. It’ll get in their hearts. Don’t give up. Keep sharing with your children scriptures and memory verses, stories and more!

Perfectionist.

Are you one? Have you been one?

I know that I have struggled with this word for most of my life. As a child I wanted the perfect bedroom, as a teenager I wanted the perfect grades, as a young adult I wanted the perfect relationship, now as a grown married woman who is a mother, I want the perfect marriage and to be the perfect mother and homemaker.

However, I am far from perfect. Just incase you were wondering if I had achieved such great status. I surely haven’t.

I use to beat myself up (mentally) with declaring over myself words like these:

Failure

Not enough

Stupid

Ugly

Fat

Clumsy

I can’t

I am not able to

I’m not smart enough

I’m not pretty enough

My body isn’t thin enough, or big enough. *if you know what I mean*

I believed these harmful lies growing up, and the worst part is, I never stopped believing them when I became an adult.

Insecurity isn’t attractive.

I know it’s not. But what do you do when you find yourself believing such horrible lies about yourself? (By the way they are in fact lies)

Do you continue to spiral out in anxiety, fear, hurt, and insecurity? I know I have.

However we don’t have to choose that route.

We can choose to take captive our thoughts, (take our thoughts and tell them to freaking shut up!) And start declaring what God says about us. What if you don’t know what God says about you? Then sweetheart, it’s time to dive into the greatest life instruction book out there. The bible. Yes, yes, so cliche’, but it’s the God’s honest truth. His word will come alive when you read it. When you read it outloud and declare it over yourself. I haven’t had an anxiety tack in a while (I was having them almost daily), I instead studied God’s word and started believing his truths instead of satan’s lies. I got to the point I honestly hadn’t felt insecure like I used to in atleast a month! I know, a month isn’t that long. However if you have ever experience anxiety in your every single day, a month is a LONG time. Then in that month because I “got better and stronger” I slowly stopped reading God’s word. Ever done that before? Yep, life was getting “easy” so I stopped feeding myself spiritually. Then, bam! Insecurity swallowed me up all in a flash of a moment. Anxiety filled my heart and I felt like I had made no progress at all. Then I started to spiral out in my thoughts saying to myself, “really Mary? Your going down this road again? I thought you were better then that? I guess you’re never going to get better. You miles well stop trying.”

These are freakin’ lies from satan ya’ll.

Don’t ever think that because you’re not perfect that progress isn’t neccessary.

Stop beating yourself up for failing. Stop binge eating out of stress. Stop being bulimic because you binge ate. Yeah, that’s right, I’m talking to YOU.

Stop making yourself so sick of yourself for failing that you over eat on icecream and junk food then make yourself feel so guilty you make yourself puke it up.

Yeah I’ve been there too.

Stop allowing this thought of “if I can’t do it perfectly, I should just stop even trying.” This is a TRAP.

This is a freakin’ trap that satan sets up to get you to fall into sin.

Yes, binge eating is a sin. Yes, being bulimic is a sin. (Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit)

-My friends, God has made us these promises. So we should stay away from everything that keeps our bodies and spirits from being clean. We should honour God and try to be completely like him. –
2 Corinthians 7:1

I don’t say this to shame you or anyone. I’ve been there! I say this to help you recognize your value and worth. You are more than the food you eat. You are more than the clothes you wear. You are more than the person you date. You are more than what he or she says or believes about you.

You are loved. You are valuable. God doesn’t desire us to live perfect lives. He doesn’t desire us to beat ourselves up over not being perfect to help deal with the guilt and shame of falling short.

The bible says ALL have fallen short of the Glory of God. (Roman’s 3:23)That includes YOU and that includes ME! We all need our ever loving grace filled Savior Jesus Christ.

We all need his forgiveness and love. We ALL need HIS grace. The word says, “my grace is sufficient for you”.

– But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christʼs power may rest on me. –
2 Corinthians 12:9

Why don’t we believe these lies about ourselves? Why do we hold ourselves to a higher standard then God even does? Do you think God believes we are going to get it right all the time?

Let me tell you, “NO, HE DOESN’T.”

That’s why he sent us Jesus. He know’s we struggle. He knows we fall short.

– All of us have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory. But God treats us much better than we deserve, and because of Christ Jesus, he freely accepts us and sets us free from our sins. –
Romans 3:23-24

He knows our heart’s desire is to please him but we still struggle against spiritual darkness and wickedness in high places.

– For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. –
Ephesians 6:12 NLT
God knew we needed a Savior because we won’t always get it right.

Jesus even said, “I told you these things so that you can have peace in me. In this world you will have trouble. But be brave! I have defeated the world!”
John 16:33 ICB

All we need to do is be brave and put our TRUST in Jesus. Jesus sets us free from sin and shame (Roman’s 3:24) We need to put our hope in him. We need to stir our faith and remember who Jesus is and what he has done for us. (Faith comes by hearing the word of God! – Romans 10:17) Because when we get our eyes off of our circumstances and get them fixed on Jesus, WOW God will move mountains. He will heal hearts and relationships.

We aren’t perfect. But Jesus is.

Prayer:

Dear Jesus, I thank you for dying on the cross for me so that I can have eternal life. I realize that I am imperfect. Please forgive me of my sins and allowing myself to believe lies instead of your truths. Help me to walk in your ways and to be lead along your straight paths. I love you Jesus and I make you Lord over my life. You are my master and I am your servant. When you speak I will listen. When you move, I will follow. Give me rest, peace, and security in you and you alone. Help me to remember that I wasn’t created to be perfect but I was created to worship your Holy Name. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

—–>

I want to leave you with this, we all have struggles.

Although they may differ from eachother, we all are fighting a spiritual battle whether you want to believe it or not, its happening. We need to equip ourselves in God’s word and to put on the armor of God so that we can fight this spiritual battle. (Ephesians 6:11-18) We already know Jesus has won and the victory is ours. So we should all fight this battle all the more confidently.

Let me ask you this one question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit by obeying the law of Moses? Of course not! You received the Spirit because you believed the message you heard about Christ. How foolish can you be? After starting your new lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort? Have you experienced so much for nothing? Surely it was not in vain, was it? I ask you again, does God give you the Holy Spirit and work miracles among you because you obey the law? Of course not! It is because you believe the message you heard about Christ.
Galatians 3:2‭-‬5 NLT

So it is clear that no one can be made right with God by trying to keep the law. For the Scriptures say, “It is through faith that a righteous person has life.” This way of faith is very different from the way of law, which says, “It is through obeying the law that a person has life.”
Galatians 3:11‭-‬12 NLT

God wants us to be equipped. He doesn’t want us scrambling around when satan attacks looking for our weapons for war. God desires us to be alert and equipped, ready for battle. Ready for every challenge ahead. He doesn’t want us blind sided. Something I have learned is that the more quality time I spend with God, the less I am moved by circumstances. The more I hear the holy spirit speaking to me and revealing things to me that I would in no way know other wise.
Did you know that the Holy Spirit can show you what is going on in other people’s hearts around you? That he can prepare you on how to handle a situation ahead? He doesn’t allow you to see these things so that you fear them but rather so that you can pray for it, the person, the heart, the situation. Prayer works. The word of God IS our “how to do life” Manuel. Why do we keep insisting that we can do life on our own strength and time? We absolutely can not! We will grow tired, weary, short fused, grouchy, and selfish. We must put on the love of jesus goggles and see life and others the way God see’s it. God isn’t moved by our circumstances. He is moved by our faith in him, knowing with God all things are possible.

If we deserved forgiveness, it wouldn’t be called grace. If we could earn it, it wouldn’t be real love. That type of radical forgiveness doesn’t seem humanly possible, but it is possible through the grace Christ has extended to each of us. Forgiveness sets you free and makes healing possible in the relationship. It’s been said, “Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and then hoping the other person dies.”

What are you holding onto that is only poisoning yourself? If we truly understand why Jesus died for us, and that it’s not by our works but by Jesus’ sacrificial love and grace… then and only then will we be able to truly forgive and truly love. Love ourselves, and others.

Stop trying to earn forgiveness or making others earn your forgiveness. That is no way to live. GOD has so much in store for you. You only have to ask him to help you in the area of forgiveness. Are you struggling to forgive yourself? Why? It’s ok to talk to someone about it. Ask Jesus to forgive you of your sins and then believe that his blood that was shed on the cross is enough. You are cleansed and no longer bound by sin. You are free in Christ Jesus. Start declaring your freedom!

Something I’ve been meditating on this week.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”

I couldn’t remember where it was found in the bible but I knew it was the word of God. Thanks to the easy tool called google I found it immediately. Matthew 6:33.

I asked myself, why that verse Lord?
He showed me that if I seek his will, his glory, his desires for my heart and my life, then that’s when all these other things will be added to my life.

Why is it that it is SO easy to jump out of bed in the morning and start doing all that there needs to be done. And then time with Jesus gets put on the to do list and sometimes the never get to list.

If we MAKE time for Jesus like we do for our other relationships or other priorities then wouldn’t our entire lives be ultimately better?

Wouldn’t decisions be easily made? What does the word of God say on the matter? If I started to ask that before answering any matter, wow! My days would go a lot more gracefully. A lot less mistakes would be made. And I would be having a constant peace about the matter.

I encourage you to spend 1 minute in Gods word, 1 minute in prayer, and 3 in praise or worship. That’s a total of 5 minutes of your busy life. Make time to put first Jesus. Dont you know when first things are first second things are better? Stop living mediocre lives and start living enriched blessed lives that God has planned for you.

(This is 100% preaching to myself right now! 😝)

Sometimes I get caught up in all the things.

All the things I see other people doing.

The places they go.

How involved they are in church and ministry.

How involved they are in their business or work.

How involved they are in their children’s school, and sports..

I shortly after start being less than content with my life and what I’m doing.

I start asking myself, am I doing enough?
Should I have more interests?
Should I be more involved in my church and ministry?

I start questioning what my “purpose” is.

Then I see a quote like this one,

“Bloom where you are planted.”

My heart is big. I desire to help others and to be involved in all the things.

However as I’ve matured I’ve learned that for every “thing” I get Involved in, I am losing that time in other “things”. I have to prioritize and reevaluate if what I am choosing in my life is mostly taking from me or giving to me. What I mean by that is, spending time with my core people adds to my life. Spending time with my husband, my sons, my close family and friends, that adds to my life. Sometimes it’s doing the very things that require me serving others however it still adds to my life because I feel loved, joyful, and rewarded sowing into those relationships.

I sometimes get caught up with the “comparison trap” which we all know that is the “THIEF THAT STEALS OUR JOY!”

I see, let’s give her the name Pam. I see “Pam” serving in 10 ways at church, and being a leader, and attending all the events… and I’m like over here struggling to serve in 1 or 2 areas once a week.

I see “Jill” over here, going to all these bible studies, church events, conferences, and I am over here happy I was able to go to one conference in the last, I don’t know, eight years?!

I start wanting what they have or better yet what they’re “doing”. Whether they’re happy doing all those things or not shouldn’t matter to me. What should matter is, the reality of sacrifices they make to be able to do all those things…

Would I be willing to leave my family for a week for a conference? Nope. I wouldn’t. I’m in no way shaming them. Remember I was jealous two seconds ago, right? However, the reality is, I don’t want to sacrifice that time away from my family.

Would I be willing to make it to worship practice or bible study every single week, at night time after working with my children and our family owned business, and cooking dinner, and doing endless laundry? The answer yet again is, a big fat NOPE. I am too tired at night to do all those things. I just want to eat dinner with my hubby on the couch, cuddle, and watch our TV shows.

Am I willing to take my kids to sport practices on weeknights and attend games on weekends? Nope, atleast not in this season of life. Maybe once they’re older.

See, I desire the “fun” experiences of all these things. However I clearly am not desiring the work and sacrifices in order to experience those things.

It’s okay to enjoy not being overly busy. There are seasons my head is spinning with all the things I have to do. Those are the seasons I do all the things, but deep down am not satisfied. Because I hadn’t snuggled my boys and read them books, in what feels like forever. I haven’t had that date night with my hubby which is long over due and I miss doing it weekly. Instead I’m involved in all the things… but my core relationships are what get sacrificed.

Does it mean I stop getting asked to do things that occasionally I may enjoy doing? Yep. It does. And it sucks.

It sucks to stop getting asked because they assume your answer will be a no.

But you know what? What sucks more? Doing all the things, being “busy” to make yourself feel accomplished and having literally ZERO peace and rest for your body, mind, and spirit. Then on top of it, wondering why your core relationships are weak and in need of some attention.

So if I want to have fun or do something that requires commitment and sacrifice… I now examine how much sacrifice it will take from my core values (quality time with my loved ones) then I decide if I can fit it into my life in that “season” of my life.

So bloom where you’re planted.

If your season of life looks more like the busy bee season, that’s totally okay! Just make sure you’re not sacrificing your most important values, core relationships, in order to “do ministry”  or to be what appears to be the “best mom” since you’re  volunteering in all the things at your kids schools.

You can do anything, but you can’t do everything.

Pick and choose. And remind yourself why you made those decisions in the first place when you find yourself start comparing yourself and your life to others around you. If you want the change, make the change, but be realistic of what the change will require of you. Sometimes it will require you to say yes to more things and no to less important things. Sometimes it will require you to say no to a lot of things so you can say yes to helping your husband clean up the yard, helping your kids learn to read, whatever it may be, just know in those seasons, your answer may need to be no more frequently.

Choose well.

Love the life you’re living. Grow in the areas you desire to see growth. Bloom where you are planted. In the season of life that you are in.

There has been seasons in my life I thought about getting some kind of life counseling. In those seasons it was usually while making big decisions. I want to start off saying it IS in fact wise to get counsel from people with wisdom on a subject that you are dealing with. The bible talks about their is wisdom in seeking counsel.

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, But he who heeds counsel is wise.
Proverbs 12:15 NKJV

Get all the advice and instruction you can, so you will be wise the rest of your life.
Proverbs 19:20‭ NLT

There are many plans in a man’s heart, Nevertheless the Lord ’s counsel—that will stand.
Proverbs 19:21 NKJV

However the bible speaks of heavenly wisdom vs. Earthly wisdom.

“But true wisdom and power are found in God; counsel and understanding are his.
Job 12:13 NLT

As I thought about seeking help from a counselor, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the scripture that he is my ultimate councelor. That Jesus sent him to guide me more then any humanly wisdom can guide me. So I decided I needed to dig into the Word of God and seek heavenly counsel. We have the Holy Spirit as our counselor. And in that moment I remembered what God’s word says about wisdom.

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
James 1:5 NKJV

👑 If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom.

😒But if you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your heart, don’t cover up the truth with boasting and lying. For jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom.

🌎 Such things are earthly, unspiritual, and demonic. For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.

🌌 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others.

🍉 It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.🌱

James 3:13‭-‬18 NLT

We are suppose to seek Godly wisdom. Not earthly wisdom. There is a significant difference. Earthly wisdom tells you to seek after wealth, success, fame, popularity, amd things that brings our flesh pleasures. It tells us we have everything within us to do whatever it is we want if we just “try and work hard enough”.

Although there is nothing wrong with money, success, fame, popularity, Instagram followers, doing life in a way of enjoying ourselves. We need to keep it in perspective. We can enjoy these things as long as they stay in their rightful catagory. You see we can’t earn our way into heaven. We surely can’t buy our way in either. We have to humbly except that we AREN’T enough. We aren’t good enough on our own. This isn’t to say your bad either. This surely isn’t to say your not enough in the context of putting yourself down and beating yourself up. This is simply recognizing that there is a NEED. A need that only Jesus can fill. That there is ONE ingredient to God’s masterpiece needed to be complete and that’s Jesus.

You say, “well I can do it on my own. I don’t have a need for Jesus” but Jesus says, you can do nothing of worth apart from him.

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.
John 15:5 NLT

Yes! You are a masterpiece! Please don’t take this as a “your not good enough message”. I am a huge advocate for positive thinking, self love, I mean we gotta love ourselves to be able to love others. The bible even says you otto love our neighbor as ourselves. And if we don’t love ourselves and see ourselves as worthy how can we love others?

Just like if you’re empty spiritually you aren’t going to pour love, joy, peace, and all the fruits of the spirit into you’re family. You have to fill up on Jesus then pour out into others. So with that said… LOVE GOD, LOVE YOURSELF, LOVE OTHERS!

You can love yourself and still recognize that you’re not perfect. That you make mistakes. That you have needs. And that one of those needs (the biggest need of all) is Jesus.

Now let’s go back to my point here as I wander off on a tangent…

Wisdom…

We aren’t to seek earthly wisdom. We aren’t to seek things that will bring us to a place of pride. There is a difference of being proud of your hard work, and being prideful. Keep that in mind here.

However there is a heavenly wisdom in the bible. Heavenly wisdom comes obviously from God, the Holy Spirit.

The bible speaks about wisdom being FAR more valuable then rubies.
(Proverbs 8:11)

You see the Holy Spirit’s leading will teach you what to say.
(Luke 12:12)

The Holy Spirit will give you spiritual life. (John 3:6)

The Holy Spirit will fill you with power from heaven!
(Luke 24:49)

The Holy Spirit will guide you!
(Galatians 5:16)

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

There is no law against these things! Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there.

Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.

Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.
Galatians 5:22‭-‬26 NLT

The Holy spirit will advocate on your behalf. He will teach you and REMIND you of God’s word! (However you have to read and study his word in the first place to be reminded of it!) A different translation says the Holy Spirit is our councilor. Which means we otto seek him for direction instead of seeking humanly wisdom.
(John 14:26)

So I say all this to encourage you today…

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.
Matthew 6:33 NLT

If you’re unsure about a direction for your life, ask the Holy Spirit to lead and guide you. Remember the Holy Spirit will never contradict the word of God. So if you can’t find it in the bible and it goes against his Word it’s not from God it’s just an opinion.

Here I am writing again about focus and priorities.

I have a tendency to want to do all the things. But I truly can’t. When I lose vision of my goals I start looking to new things and ideas to take place of the ones I currently am not doing anything about. I know I am not the only one. For instance, yesterday I was feeling overwhelmed, my head was spinning with all there is to do, all I want to do, new ideas, etc.

I needed to be focused and get work done. But my brain was overloaded and my emotions were wack.

I know it was because, A. I started that time of the month, and B. I hadn’t spent time with the Lord and waking up the way I need to, slowly, in the quiet, with no one needing anything from me. I need that time to function properly. I don’t simply want it, I need it. I need it because I then can pour into the little ones who wake up and immediately tell me they’re hungry and thirsty before it’s daylight. I need it so I can happily make my husband coffee and talk to him about the things we need to do that day. I need it so I can have time to write all that’s in my head down so I can prioritize my day. I need it so I can accomplish and tackle the things at work in order to run a successful business. I need it so I can remember that I need to set meat out to thaw to cook for dinner that night so I’m not ordering my children pizza at 8:30pm because I simply forgot to feed them. Y’all, I need that quiet time. I don’t get it any other time of the day. I need a moment where no one needs anything from me. Where I can fill up my heart with God’s word, my spirit with his presence, and my mind with his peace. I need time to myself in the morning to think about what’s in my head without others adding more to my brain. I need that time of quiet so I can examine my heart, my motives, my desires, and pray and talk to God. It’s the only time that I can need something from someone else and not add anything to their plate because God can handle it all. He can handle my period emotions. He can handle my scattered thoughts zooming thru my brain. I call it my spaghetti. Where every thought touches the other and it’s all piled up and unorganized. God can handle my deepest heart’s desires without being overwhelmed or stressed out. I need my quiet time in the morning. And it’s no one’s fault but my own for not getting it. Because I simply just need to wake up when my alarm goes off instead of climbing back into my warm cozy bed. I simply just have to get up, wash my face, make myself a cup of tea, go into the other room, start with praise and worship gently playing, then prayer, making requests to God and thanking him for all he has done already. Then opening his word, some days it’s a few chapters in different books, while other days it’s one or two verses that I just meditate on and marinate on. I will sometimes read a chapter in one of my Christian books that helps give me insight on being a Godly wife, mother, friend, or spiritual prayer warrior.

I need this time and I need to stop making the excuses of being too tired to make it happen. I need to go to bed earlier. I need to set my alarm. I need to wake up and just do it.

What is something you need to do daily that helps kick your day off onto the right beat?

I find there are seasons I hear the Lord’s voice, it’s usually when I’m intently seeking his word and will for my life. It took me a while to start recognizing his voice apart from my mind. Sometimes he speaks to me thru dreams, visions, word of knowledge, and sometimes its thru recognizing the Holy Spirit’s still small voice prompting me.

My husband Mic;

I either had a dream or a vision, I feel like it was day time though if I remember right. I think it was a vision. Anyways… vision of myself walking down the isle towards my husband. He was tall, dark hair, wearing all white (ivory) but I didn’t see his face.

At that time I was dating a guy for 3.5 years that was not tall and had dirty blonde hair. The lord had been telling me he wasn’t the man for me for a while but after that vision I knew. I broke up with him. Within a month I met my husband. We met, dated, got engaged and married within 11 months. I forgot about that vision until I walked down the isle. It came back to me like dejuvu. Except this time I could see his face (because it was real life). He was even wearing ivory just like my dress, we made these choices without even remembering my vision. I never saught out a tall dark handsome man. Honestly that wasn’t even my “type”. It’s almost like the Lord allowed me to forget that vision while I met him so that I wouldn’t of been searching out a type. Instead it just happened because of my obedience to end the other relationship. And now we have been married 7 years and counting. We are more deeply in love today then ever before.

Our children…

The Lord spoke to me about each of our sons and their names. Emmanuel (God with us), and Malachi (messenger of God).

Emmanuel;

I had a dream with my first son Emmanuel. I saw him as a baby and everything, I was facing fear of being a bad mother (while we were trying to get pregnant for 11 months) and the Lord gave me a dream. I was changing his diaper and he had black straight hair and I called him Emmanuel, and in that dream God said to me, for I am with you, be at peace. I woke up with total peace and confidence in having a baby. A few weeks later I conceived.

Oh and by the way Emmanuel as a baby looked exactly like that dream! Eventually his black hair fell out and went blonde.

Malachi Jordan;

I knew from the moment he was conceived. I just knew. I told my husband we just made a baby and he laughed at me. I was on birth control too. And I said I got the name Malachi. I looked up his name meaning. Messenger of God. At this point I told my husband I needed to stop taking birth control atleast until my next period cycle, because I didn’t want it to harm the baby. I told him if I am wrong we can just use backup. But I knew I wasn’t wrong. A few weeks later I was confirmed to be pregnant.

Here is a truth 💣

Mind exploded 💥

Jesus is love. His love has no limits.

Let’s stop for a minute and reflect on how good he is.

Life is hard.

Like crazy hard.

But in the midst of the trials, chaos, exhaustion, sickness, sleepless nights, and hard days… Jesus’ love for us remains the same.

It’s so easy to get caught up with all we have to do that we lose sight of all of who Jesus is and all of what he has done for us.

Somedays I am weak and tired. I feel as if I can’t go on much longer. I Iook to attainable things to fill the void. Maybe I just need coffee, or a massage, maybe I just need some pampering alone time.

Nope.

I did need some alone time. But not to feel pampered or to have “me time”. I needed alone time with Jesus. I needed “us time”. I started to feel the inner hopelessness coming on from the exhaustion.

But Jesus.

Ya’ll I don’t know why we live our lives forgetting that he is our source of strength. He is our source of Joy. He is our source of rest.

Yes, my body needs physical rest. Clearly with being sick for 3 weeks and insanely busy, my body said no more before my brain did.

But Jesus.

He can change my heart in a moment. Just a moment of reading his word. Spending time in his presence. Reading a book that points me to him.

I can do all the things… but I will always be working out of my strength. Until I remember I can’t do all the things. I physically can’t. But he did. He physically did everything for me to have eternal life and to walk with me in this life on earth.

There is a lot of good things out there that isn’t the God thing for me. I have to keep my focus on him and his desires that he placed in my heart.
💖